An Open Letter To Pervez Musharraf

My dear General,

What were you thinking?

What were you thinking when you tacitly intruded into Kargil in 1999?
What were you thinking when you pulled off your coup in Pakistan?
What were you thinking when you subverted your country's constitution and imposed yourself as the 'president'?
What were you thinking when you declared 'War on Terror' while supporting the very same terror infrastructure?
What were you thinking when you wrote your so called 'memoirs'?

Was it the $1 Million advance from Simon & Schuster? Or was it the impending elections in Pakistan that prompted you to write that book? Whatever it be, you sure seem to have a penchant for controversy and a panache for adapting to vicissitudes. Congratulations on selecting the name for your book - In The Line Of Fire. It sure is self fulfilling, General, it definitely puts you directly in the line of fire all over again...

With elections barely a year away, and Uncle Sam breathing down your neck, cajoling you to 'restore democracy', this certainly is the best thing you could do. All the while, bandying about your so-called efforts at contributing in the war against terror. Is it mere coincidence that you suggested all those schemes and plans to Dr.Manmohan Singh a week before you actually launched the book? You go to extreme lengths to provoke the Indian Govt. so you can turn around and blame India of high-handedness in case the talks fail.

I can't decide whether you are an imbecile or an ignoramus. Or maybe just a shrewd political manipulator. Those allegations of India's buildup in the Northern Sector pre-Kargil '99 are not only preposterous, baseless and unsubstantiated; they are downright subversive and insulting. It's not worth commenting on, to be honest.

You say that you won a tactical victory, General Musharraf. I hope you say that to yourself in front of the mirror each day to boost your political libido. You certainly need it. Sometimes the only way one can survive is by living in self-denial. Point proven in your case.

I hate to break this to you General, but you have failed. You failed as the leader of Pakistan's armed forces, you failed as a 'President' and now you have failed as a writer as well.

Good luck General. You need it. I sincerely hope that you don't indulge in any military adventurism with India again. I was at the border recently and had occasion to meet our troops there. They can't wait to teach you a lesson once again.

Cheers!

P.S. I hope you have the money stashed away in a Swiss bank account. You're gonna need it.

Footnote to Dr. Manmohan Singh:
My dear PM,

I have tremendous respect for you, your integrity and your ability. To be honest, I wasn't sure you were best suited to lead our country back in 2004. I am still not convinced, but you certainly are leagues ahead of the 'competition'. It's refreshing to have someone like you at the post of PM.

That said, I hope you have no plans whatsoever of reneging control over J & K to some pseudo-joint control mechanism. You will be insulting the sacrifice of every jawan and the sensibility of every Indian if you do so. Fighting on is a bitter pill and it's not everyone's cup of tea. I do hope you have the gumption to carry on and not undo what has been built up slowly and with great pain in the past.

Best wishes.

Ghost Who Rocks

My niece celebrated her birthday recently. I managed to be present for the occasion though it was a weekday. To say that my niece was surprised is an understatement. Whatever it be, she was overjoyed and decided to spend the rest of the evening climbing all over me and generally behaving in a very affectionate manner which involved pulling my cheeks and kicking me about. She insisted on playing throwball to the chagrin of everyone present; every consecutive throw getting more and more violent till the offending article had to be put out of action.

Interested in my niece's progress in life, I decided to ask her what she wanted to be in life. On her last year she had maintained that she wanted to be me. Impossible it may be, but flattering nevertheless.

This time however, her answer was quite different.

'A Ghost', she noted cheerfully.

'A Ghost?', I asked incredulously.

'A Ghost?', her parents echoed?

My dad just looked up from the ToI he was reading (we subscribe to HT at home so he doesn't get to read ToI anymore). Mom was too busy in the kitchen to observe her grand-daughter's newest career option.

Till date, ghosts had been used in varying degrees by her parents and her grandparents to cajole/coax/threaten/frighten her... depending on the task at hand. It could be used to prevent her from wandering too close to the pool in the evenin, or simply to make her stay quiet for a while. Fear factor.

All of us demanded an explanation.

It was quite simple really. I, for one, should have guessed.

'Well', said the lil thing, 'Mama can be seen at night and he dissappears in the morning. So he must be a ghost. And if Mama's a ghost, then I wanna be one too!'

Such a darling.

Not The Ladakh Post

Lage Raho Munnabhai totally rocks. Everyone in the movie rocks - Sanjay Dutt, Arshad Warsi, Boman Irani, Vidya Balan, Dia Mirza and pretty much all other characters who make up this laugh riot. Just watched it and I wouldn't mind sitting through another 3 hours of the same right now.

Will be writing a separate post on Ladakh soon. Haven't been able to get the time to sit down and pen it down. Maybe the pics spoke half the story, but there are quite a few interesting incidents, facts et al that do need to be mentioned. Soon.

Speaking of Ladakh, there's this new Airtel ad on TV that shows a bunch of young women sitting in a tent in Ladakh and one of them manages to get a phone call. The ad supposedly touts the 'reception' and 'network' of Airtel in 'remote' places. To prove a point, they manage to show a milestone that says 'Leh - 124' km.

The village (yes, that green patch is a village) shown in the background suspiciously looks like Shakti, though I may be mistaken. Rightly, Airtel is the only network apart from BSNL that has any coverage in Ladakh. However, try as I might, I cannot recall getting the Airtel network on my cellphone (or Arya's for that matter) anywhere that was more than 10 km away from Leh. And certainly not in Shakti.

Second point - I am not sure there are many groups of 'Indian girls' touring Ladakh. I did see one group in Manali, but definitely not in Ladakh. And what the hell are they doing, pitching a tent at the edge of a cliff?

Incidentally, a friend of mine is trekking through HP & Ladakh with her sister. They are carrying a satellite phone with them, thanks to the lack of network in those areas.

Still, I hope Airtel is right. It can only be good news, eh?